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#3031016 - 06/14/10 02:54 PM Your Mama So Fat  
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 15,827
Mace71 Offline
Dread pirate Mace
Mace71  Offline
Dread pirate Mace
Veteran

Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 15,827
Darlington, UK.

when she step on the Weight Scales it says...'to be continued'...

she once went on a seafood diet...whenever she saw food she ate it!

folk exercise by jogging around her!

when she bends over, we enter Daylight Saving Time.

she sat on a Nintendo Gamecube and it turned into a gameboy

she make Kiko the Whale look like a Smartie

NASA plan to use her to shore up the hole in the Ozone layer

she was measured at 38-26-36 and that was just the left arm...

small objects orbit her.

she make olympic sumo wrestlers look anerixic.

when I tell her to haul ass, she gotta make two trips.

when she farted she launched herself into orbit.

she lost a game at Hide&Seek only cos I spotted her...behind Mount Everest.

when I had to swerve to avoid hitting her on the road I ran out of Petrol!

she could be the eighth continent.

she nearly put Safeway out of business

the only thing that's attracted to her is gravity.

her Uni graduation photo was an aerial

when she auditioned for a part in Raiders of the Lost Ark she got the part of the big Rolling Ball.

she make Jabba the Hutt look anorexic.

her fave food is seconds.

her belt size is Equator.

she eats Desert out of a Trash Can lid

she wears an 'X' jacket and Copters attempt to land on her

she shows up on radar.

she needs a map to find her butt.

she fell into the Grand Canyon....and got stuck!

she wears an asteroid belt.

her Passport photo says 'Picture is continued overleaf'

she has TB ... 2 bellys.

she's once, twice, three times a lady.

she was in the Daily Record last week on page 5, 6, 7, 8, and 9.

the circus use her as a trampoline

stunt agencies use her as an air mattress

when she opens the Fridge it says - 'I give up...'

she got a new gig at the Cinema...she works as the screen

she once told me 'I could eat a horse'...believe me, she wasn't kidding!

she deep fries her toothpaste.



I don't know why, I just did smile


Antec 902 | Intel i7 920 2.66Ghz OC'd to 3.40GHz | MSI GeForce GTX 660 Black Knight 2048MB GDDR5 | Corsair 6GB DDR3 | Coolermaster V8 CPU Cooler | W7 64

"There is only one way to avoid criticism: do nothing, say nothing and be nothing." Aristotle
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#3031026 - 06/14/10 03:10 PM Re: Your Mama So Fat [Re: Mace71]  
Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 4,372
Skater Offline
Senior Member
Skater  Offline
Senior Member

Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 4,372
NYC

Yo mama so fat... She wears a VCR like a beeper...

biggrin

-Skater


"As Iron Sharpens Iron, so does a friend sharpen a friend." Proverbs 27:17
"There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither bond nor free, there is neither male nor female, for ye are all one in Christ Jesus." Galatians 3:28
Never, ever, underestimate the ability of people to discount Occam's Razor. - Dart
"I don't want to abolish government. I simply want to reduce it to the size where I can drag it into the bathroom and drown it in the bathtub." - Grover Norquist
#3031031 - 06/14/10 03:18 PM Re: Your Mama So Fat [Re: Skater]  
Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 40,112
20mm Offline
Site Emeritus
Honorary Forums Manager
20mm  Offline
Site Emeritus
Honorary Forums Manager
Sierra Hotel

Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 40,112
Tucson AZ
I'm waiting for Haggart to arrive.


Pat Tillman (1976-2004):
4 years Arizona State University, graduated with high honors.
5 seasons National Football League player, Arizona Cardinals.
Forever United States Army Ranger.
#3031088 - 06/14/10 04:24 PM Re: Your Mama So Fat [Re: 20mm]  
Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 8,567
Hankmc Offline
Hotshot
Hankmc  Offline
Hotshot

Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 8,567
NJ USA
I remember a guy from Louisiana I was in the Army with who had some classics in the yo' momma, yo' girlfriend etc. whatever game.

Her a$$ was as wide as two wall lockers with the doors open.

Her hair was so thin you could smell her brains.

Ugly as ten miles of tank trails after a rain storm.

Her breathe smelled like collard greens and hobo sh1t.

Ol' Russ Robinson was a very descriptive dude smile

#3031121 - 06/14/10 05:05 PM Re: Your Mama So Fat [Re: Hankmc]  
Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 22,405
letterboy1 Offline
(Heterosexual)Tchaikovsky Ballet Fan
letterboy1  Offline
(Heterosexual)Tchaikovsky Ballet Fan
Lifer

Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 22,405
Columbus, GA USA
Here are a few more standards:

Yo mama so fat, when they cut her leg, gravy come out.

" " " ", when she sits around the house, she really sits around the house.

" " " ", she got her own zip code.

" " " ", she wear designer jeans from Goodyear.

" " " ", to make love to her, you got to slap her thighs and ride the wave in.


The issue is not p*ssy. The issue is monkey.
#3031144 - 06/14/10 05:26 PM Re: Your Mama So Fat [Re: Mace71]  
Joined: Oct 1999
Posts: 1,573
Psycho Offline
Member
Psycho  Offline
Member

Joined: Oct 1999
Posts: 1,573
NY, USA
Yo mama so fat.....

....she has back cleavage

#3031149 - 06/14/10 05:32 PM Re: Your Mama So Fat [Re: Mace71]  
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 5,872
Sauron Offline
Successor to Bill the Cat!
Sauron  Offline
Successor to Bill the Cat!
Hotshot

Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 5,872
Quantum Superstate
...if she wears stilletto heels, she strikes oil! She has to wear a watch on both wrists, she covers more than one time zone! And ugly! They took her to a plastic surgeon...he suggested adding a tail! When she was a kid, they sat her in the corner and fed her with a slingshot! And they had to tie a pork chop around her neck to get the dog to play with her! Her chest is covered in red dots from people pushing her away with ten-foot poles! I mean she's ugly!

Cheers!

Rick... eek


"We are extending ourselves in Space and Time not because of capitalism or socialism but in spite of them. The Right/Left Capitalist/Socialist establishments are psychologically unprepared for our emerging situation in Time and Space." - F. M. Esfandiary, Upwingers
#3031161 - 06/14/10 05:47 PM Re: Your Mama So Fat [Re: Sauron]  
Joined: Apr 2002
Posts: 5,503
Pooch Offline
Hotshot
Pooch  Offline
Hotshot

Joined: Apr 2002
Posts: 5,503
Orlando, FL
Yo mama's so fat, that when she wears a yellow rain coat, kids line up at the bus stop!


"From our orbital vantage point, we observe an earth without borders, full of peace, beauty and magnificence, and we pray that humanity as a whole can imagine a borderless world as we see it, and strive to live as one in peace."
Astronaut William C. McCool RIP, January 29, 2003 - Space Shuttle Columbia

#3031795 - 06/15/10 01:20 PM Re: Your Mama So Fat [Re: Pooch]  
Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 124
Ironside Offline
Member
Ironside  Offline
Member

Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 124
Sweden
... she has X-wings buzzing in her a**crack!


"Bleed?....I ain´t got time to bleed.."

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