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#3288439 - 05/06/11 02:27 PM Joke: A Real Woman...  
Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 5,864 Bill_Grant Offline
Hotshot
Bill_Grant  Offline
Hotshot

Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 5,864
Dallas, TX

A Real Woman....

A real woman is a man's best friend.

She will never stand him up and never let him down.

She will reassure him when he feels insecure and comfort him after a bad day.

She will inspire him to do things he never thought he could do; to live without fear and forget regret.

She will enable him to express his deepest emotions and give in to his most intimate desires.

She will make sure he always feels as though he's the most handsome man in the room and will enable him to be the most confident, sexy, seductive and invincible...

No wait...

Sorry.
I'm thinking of whiskey.
It's whiskey that does all that. Never mind.

~Bill

In my defense, I was left unsupervised...
Inline advert (2nd and 3rd post)
#3288442 - 05/06/11 02:28 PM Re: Joke: A Real Woman... [Re: Bill_Grant]  
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 121,500 PanzerMeyer Online centaurian
Pro-Consul of Florida
PanzerMeyer  Online Centaurian
Pro-Consul of Florida
King Crimson - SimHQ's Top Poster

Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 121,500
Miami, FL USA
You're on a roll today Bill. smile

“Whoever fights monsters should see to it that in the process he does not become a monster. And if you gaze long enough into an abyss, the abyss will gaze back into you.”
#3288452 - 05/06/11 02:39 PM Re: Joke: A Real Woman... [Re: Bill_Grant]  
Joined: Nov 2001
Posts: 24,083 oldgrognard Offline
Administrator
oldgrognard  Offline
Administrator
Lifer

Joined: Nov 2001
Posts: 24,083
USA
Oh my - that was so good.

Bill, you've outdone yourself.

OMG I loved that.

Good people sleep peaceably in their beds at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf.

Someday your life will flash in front of your eyes. Make sure it is worth watching.
#3288491 - 05/06/11 03:34 PM Re: Joke: A Real Woman... [Re: Bill_Grant]  
Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 10,952 Jeevz Offline
Duke of URL
Jeevz  Offline
Duke of URL
Veteran

Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 10,952
Clermont, FL
hahaha

Commence to Jigglin'
#3288501 - 05/06/11 03:48 PM Re: Joke: A Real Woman... [Re: Bill_Grant]  
Joined: Nov 2007
Posts: 4,619 KRT_Bong Offline
It's KRT not Kurt
KRT_Bong  Offline
It's KRT not Kurt
Senior Member

Joined: Nov 2007
Posts: 4,619
Sarasota, Florida
I need a Brand Name, Dammit

Windows 10 Pro
Gigabyte 970A DS3P FX
AMD FX6300 Vishera 3.5 Ghz
ASUS STRIX GeForce GTX 970 Overclocked 4 GB DDR5
16Gb Patriot Viper 3 RAM DDR3 1866Mhz
Onikuma Gaming Headset (has annoying blue lights I don't use)
#3288555 - 05/06/11 05:04 PM Re: Joke: A Real Woman... [Re: Bill_Grant]  
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 1,908 Biff99 Offline
Bullet Magnet
Biff99  Offline
Bullet Magnet
Member

Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 1,908
Ohio
biggrin That was great.

"My doctor says I wouldn't get so many nosebleeds if I kept my finger out of there." - Ralph Wiggum
#3288564 - 05/06/11 05:12 PM Re: Joke: A Real Woman... [Re: Bill_Grant]  
Joined: Sep 2010
Posts: 1,216 Josh Echo Offline
Member
Josh Echo  Offline
Member

Joined: Sep 2010
Posts: 1,216
I approve of this joke.
#3288621 - 05/06/11 06:33 PM Re: Joke: A Real Woman... [Re: Bill_Grant]  
Joined: Oct 1999
Posts: 9,947 Dervish Offline
Hotshot
Dervish  Offline
Hotshot

Joined: Oct 1999
Posts: 9,947
Alcohol...the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems. Homer Simpson

FTX Global
#3288912 - 05/07/11 01:50 AM Re: Joke: A Real Woman... [Re: Bill_Grant]  
Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 4,585 coasty Offline
Senior Member
coasty  Offline
Senior Member

Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 4,585
Asheville, NC, USA
LO-freakin'-L

Have you seen the Arrow? WWW
#3288971 - 05/07/11 03:20 AM Re: Joke: A Real Woman... [Re: Bill_Grant]  
Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 3,256 Rogered Offline
The Antipodean
Rogered  Offline
The Antipodean
Senior Member

Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 3,256
Melbourne, Vic, Australia
That is freaking awesome (and true!)

Local Area Network in Australia : The LAN down under.

For a list of all the ways technology has failed to improve the quality of life, please press three.
- Alice Kahn

The light that burns twice as bright burns for half as long - and you have burned so very, very brightly, Roy.

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