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#4564621 - 04/16/21 04:51 PM Eating Healty  
Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 5,864
Bill_Grant Offline
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Bill_Grant  Offline
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Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 5,864
Dallas, TX
Here's the problem with fruit, its inconsistent.
One day you get a great apple, the next a bad one.
One time you get a sweet blueberry, the next is disgusting.

You know what isn't inconsistent? Doritos.


~Bill

In my defense, I was left unsupervised...
Inline advert (2nd and 3rd post)

#4564622 - 04/16/21 04:52 PM Re: Eating Healty [Re: Bill_Grant]  
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Posts: 5,864
Bill_Grant Offline
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Bill_Grant  Offline
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Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 5,864
Dallas, TX
It two Meth-Heads are dating, are they "Speed Dating" or "Just Methin' around"?


~Bill

In my defense, I was left unsupervised...
#4564623 - 04/16/21 04:54 PM Re: Eating Healty [Re: Bill_Grant]  
Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 5,864
Bill_Grant Offline
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Bill_Grant  Offline
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Posts: 5,864
Dallas, TX
I don't like making plans for the day.
Because the word "premeditated" gets thrown around in the courtroom.


~Bill

In my defense, I was left unsupervised...
#4564624 - 04/16/21 04:55 PM Re: Eating Healty [Re: Bill_Grant]  
Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 5,864
Bill_Grant Offline
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Bill_Grant  Offline
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Dallas, TX
Street crime is getting bad these days, and you can't be too careful out there.
Just last night I was walking to my car in a parking lot and a guy attacked me with a pair of scissors.
Fortunately, I was able to reach into my pocket and take out my rock. If I had only brought paper I would have been a goner for sure.


~Bill

In my defense, I was left unsupervised...
#4564625 - 04/16/21 04:58 PM Re: Eating Healty [Re: Bill_Grant]  
Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 5,864
Bill_Grant Offline
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Bill_Grant  Offline
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Dallas, TX
*For Panzer*

We went and saw a Spanish magician. "When I count to three I will be gone."

Uno

Dos

*POOF*

He disappeared without a tres.


~Bill

In my defense, I was left unsupervised...
#4564841 - 04/17/21 04:40 PM Re: Eating Healty [Re: Bill_Grant]  
Joined: Sep 2009
Posts: 2,921
vonBaur Offline
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vonBaur  Offline
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Joined: Sep 2009
Posts: 2,921
Someone needs to make a *rimshot* emoji, just for Bill.


SALUTE TO ALL!
#4564849 - 04/17/21 05:19 PM Re: Eating Healty [Re: vonBaur]  
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 12,481
MarkG Offline
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MarkG  Offline
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Posts: 12,481
The Bayou
Originally Posted by vonBaur
Someone needs to make a *rimshot* emoji, just for Bill.


Agreed.

Also need a headbanging emoji for the Music board please!



The rusty wire that holds the cork that keeps the anger in
Gives way and suddenly it’s day again
The sun is in the east
Even though the day is done
Two suns in the sunset, hmph
Could be the human race is run
#4564853 - 04/17/21 05:26 PM Re: Eating Healty [Re: Bill_Grant]  
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 121,345
PanzerMeyer Offline
Pro-Consul of Florida
PanzerMeyer  Offline
Pro-Consul of Florida
King Crimson - SimHQ's Top Poster

Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 121,345
Miami, FL USA
Originally Posted by Bill_Grant
*For Panzer*

We went and saw a Spanish magician. "When I count to three I will be gone."

Uno

Dos

*POOF*

He disappeared without a tres.


Love it. How’s your Spanish coming along by the way Bill? Your wife speaks it so you have no excuse! wink


“Whoever fights monsters should see to it that in the process he does not become a monster. And if you gaze long enough into an abyss, the abyss will gaze back into you.”
#4564856 - 04/17/21 05:52 PM Re: Eating Healty [Re: Bill_Grant]  
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Posts: 11,942
Crane Hunter Offline
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Crane Hunter  Offline
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Originally Posted by Bill_Grant
*For Panzer*

We went and saw a Spanish magician. "When I count to three I will be gone."

Uno

Dos

*POOF*

He disappeared without a tres.


[Linked Image]

#4564863 - 04/17/21 06:48 PM Re: Eating Healty [Re: Bill_Grant]  
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 12,481
MarkG Offline
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MarkG  Offline
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Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 12,481
The Bayou
Not a rimshot but close (a cymbalshot)...

Attached Files NP.gif


The rusty wire that holds the cork that keeps the anger in
Gives way and suddenly it’s day again
The sun is in the east
Even though the day is done
Two suns in the sunset, hmph
Could be the human race is run
#4564868 - 04/17/21 06:54 PM Re: Eating Healty [Re: Bill_Grant]  
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 10,557
Arthonon Online content
Veteran
Arthonon  Online Content
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Posts: 10,557
California


Ken Cartwright

No single drop of rain feels it is responsible for the flood.

http://www.techflyer.net

#4564992 - 04/18/21 11:48 AM Re: Eating Healty [Re: Bill_Grant]  
Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 1,612
JohnnyChemo Offline
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JohnnyChemo  Offline
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Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 1,612
Buffalo, NY
....and right after the rimshot we need to throw in the ol' sad trombone...



Throughout history, poverty is the normal condition of man. Advances which permit this norm to be exceeded — here and there, now and then — are the work of an extremely small minority, frequently despised, often condemned, and almost always opposed by all right-thinking people. Whenever this tiny minority is kept from creating, or (as sometimes happens) is driven out of a society, the people then slip back into abject poverty.
This is known as "bad luck.”
-Robert Heinlein
#4564999 - 04/18/21 01:05 PM Re: Eating Healty [Re: Bill_Grant]  
Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 5,864
Bill_Grant Offline
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Bill_Grant  Offline
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Posts: 5,864
Dallas, TX
Man I play to a tough crowd! HAHA!


mi español es basura


~Bill

In my defense, I was left unsupervised...
#4565028 - 04/18/21 04:30 PM Re: Eating Healty [Re: Bill_Grant]  
Joined: Sep 2009
Posts: 2,921
vonBaur Offline
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vonBaur  Offline
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Joined: Sep 2009
Posts: 2,921
Originally Posted by Bill_Grant
Man I play to a tough crowd! HAHA!

I don't know. I think it's befitting the Henny Youngman of SimHQ.


SALUTE TO ALL!
#4565084 - 04/18/21 10:59 PM Re: Eating Healty [Re: MarkG]  
Joined: Oct 2008
Posts: 1,735
David Kennard Offline
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David Kennard  Offline
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Posts: 1,735
Northern Virginia, USA
Originally Posted by MarkG
Originally Posted by vonBaur
Someone needs to make a *rimshot* emoji, just for Bill.


Agreed.

Also need a headbanging emoji for the Music board please!


\,,/(>.<)\,,/

[Linked Image]


"I'm a hundred miles away son, ready to strike"

GPL Racing: Average Drivers Club

SimHQ Motorsports: SimHQ Motorsports

EVGA Z170 Classified K MB, Intel i7-6700K CPU, EVGA GeForce GTX 1080 FTW2 GPU, EVGA 850 G3 PSU, Bitfenix Dawn TG Case, Windows 10,
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#4565776 - 04/24/21 01:56 AM Re: Eating Healty [Re: Bill_Grant]  
Joined: Apr 2009
Posts: 173
WolverineFW Offline
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WolverineFW  Offline
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Joined: Apr 2009
Posts: 173
Bill was on fire there..

#4565778 - 04/24/21 02:26 AM Re: Eating Healty [Re: Bill_Grant]  
Joined: Nov 2001
Posts: 24,005
oldgrognard Offline
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oldgrognard  Offline
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Lifer

Joined: Nov 2001
Posts: 24,005
USA
Bill, your Spanish may be garbage but your jokes aren’t.


Good people sleep peaceably in their beds at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf.

Someday your life will flash in front of your eyes. Make sure it is worth watching.
#4565779 - 04/24/21 02:37 AM Re: Eating Healty [Re: Bill_Grant]  
Joined: Sep 2009
Posts: 2,921
vonBaur Offline
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vonBaur  Offline
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Posts: 2,921
He is definitely fluent in funny.


SALUTE TO ALL!

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