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#4538066 - 09/22/20 11:06 PM MEN ARE JUST HAPPIER PEOPLE  
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NoFlyBoy Online content
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This needs no explanation - and is a fun read, no matter your gender.

Men Are Just Happier People!

What do you expect from such simple creatures?

Your last name stays put.

The garage is all yours.

Wedding plans take care of themselves.

Chocolate is just another snack.

You can never be pregnant.

You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.

You can wear NO shirt to a water park.

Car mechanics tell you the truth.

You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.

Wrinkles add character.

A wedding dress - $5,000 VS Tux rental - $100.

People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.

New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.

One mood all the time.

Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.

A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.

You can open all your own jars.

You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.

If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.

Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.

Two pairs of shoes are more than enough.

You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.

Everything on your face stays its original color.

The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.

You only have to shave your face and neck.

You can play with toys all your life.

One wallet and one pair of shoes - one color for all seasons.

You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.

You can 'do' your nails with a pocket knife.

You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.

You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.

No wonder men are happier!



NICKNAMES

If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Kate and Sarah.

If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Bubba and Wildman.



EATING OUT

When the bill arrives, Mike, Dave and John will each throw in $20, even though it's only for $32.50. None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back.

When the girls get their bill, the outcome is the pocket calculators.




MONEY

A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.

A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need but it's on sale.



BATHROOMS

A man has six items in his bathroom: toothbrush and toothpaste, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel.

The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337 A man would not be able to identify more than 20 of these items.



ARGUMENTS

A woman has the last word in any argument.

Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.



FUTURE

A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.

A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.



MARRIAGE

A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn’t.

A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, but she does.



DRESSING UP

A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the trash, answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail.

A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.



NATURAL

Men wake up as good-looking as they go to bed.

Women somehow deteriorate during the night.



OFFSPRING

Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams.

A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.



THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

A married man should forget his mistakes. There's no use in two people remembering the same thing!

So, send this to the women who have a sense of humor …. and to the men who will enjoy reading.

Inline advert (2nd and 3rd post)

#4538072 - 09/23/20 01:19 AM Re: MEN ARE JUST HAPPIER PEOPLE [Re: NoFlyBoy]  
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Everything on your face stays its original color.

I am 53. Black turned into salt and pepper, heavy on the salt.

#4538090 - 09/23/20 05:28 AM Re: MEN ARE JUST HAPPIER PEOPLE [Re: NoFlyBoy]  
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Originally Posted by NoFlyBoy
So, send this to the women who have a sense of humor

Therein lies another difference between men and women, which you forgot to include. smile


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#4538102 - 09/23/20 11:07 AM Re: MEN ARE JUST HAPPIER PEOPLE [Re: NoFlyBoy]  
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The greatest evidence that men are happier is that men can have the same furniture layout in their living room for decades and be completely satisfied while women have to re-arrange everything like every 6 months.


“Whoever fights monsters should see to it that in the process he does not become a monster. And if you gaze long enough into an abyss, the abyss will gaze back into you.”
#4538110 - 09/23/20 11:50 AM Re: MEN ARE JUST HAPPIER PEOPLE [Re: NoFlyBoy]  
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For most of the members here,,We spend hours flying and fighting on our rigs,,women consider this a total waste of time but they spend hours walking around in stores looking for something to buy that they didn't know they needed


Russ
Semper Fi
#4538112 - 09/23/20 12:04 PM Re: MEN ARE JUST HAPPIER PEOPLE [Re: rwatson]  
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PanzerMeyer Online centaurian
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Originally Posted by rwatson
For most of the members here,,We spend hours flying and fighting on our rigs,,women consider this a total waste of time but they spend hours walking around in stores looking for something to buy that they didn't know they needed



Truth!


“Whoever fights monsters should see to it that in the process he does not become a monster. And if you gaze long enough into an abyss, the abyss will gaze back into you.”
#4538122 - 09/23/20 01:47 PM Re: MEN ARE JUST HAPPIER PEOPLE [Re: NoFlyBoy]  
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NoFlyBoy Online content
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This was required learning in me college




#4538128 - 09/23/20 02:07 PM Re: MEN ARE JUST HAPPIER PEOPLE [Re: NoFlyBoy]  
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Originally Posted by NoFlyBoy
This was required learning in me college




I thought you were going on vacation ?

#4538134 - 09/23/20 03:25 PM Re: MEN ARE JUST HAPPIER PEOPLE [Re: NoFlyBoy]  
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NoFlyBoy Online content
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Yes. Leave at 3 pm. So I will be gracing everyone here with my presence for a couple more hours.

#4538209 - 09/24/20 08:24 AM Re: MEN ARE JUST HAPPIER PEOPLE [Re: rwatson]  
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Originally Posted by PanzerMeyer
The greatest evidence that men are happier is that men can have the same furniture layout in their living room for decades and be completely satisfied while women have to re-arrange everything like every 6 months.

Every six months? You have it easy mate! Triggers that make me mutter 'oh good grief' are my wife of 39 years uttering "I've been thinking", or "at some stage, when you have a moment".

Originally Posted by rwatson
For most of the members here,,We spend hours flying and fighting on our rigs,,women consider this a total waste of time but they spend hours walking around in stores looking for something to buy that they didn't know they needed

My wife doesn't do the lattter, but I concur on the former. Susan doesn't get the concept of doing something for hours with no discernable end-product. Still calls my gaming time 'Soppy Spitfires' after a 5 year old daughter dobbed me in saying "Daddy isn't really working Mummy; he's playing Soppy Spitfires again!". (In the days of EAW) I'd remind Jenny of that betrayal when she would call me from university with a plaintive "Daaaddyyyy, I've run out of moneeeyyyy". She retorted that she promised to find me the best care home in return smile



#4538214 - 09/24/20 10:00 AM Re: MEN ARE JUST HAPPIER PEOPLE [Re: PanzerMeyer]  
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Originally Posted by PanzerMeyer
The greatest evidence that men are happier is that men can have the same furniture layout in their living room for decades and be completely satisfied while women have to re-arrange everything like every 6 months.


You hit the nail right on the head there Panzer.

I have lived at my present location for 11 years and the furniture is exactly where I arranged it when I moved in. Oh,I did reposition my PC set-up when I got a new desk,you have to attend to the important stuff. The apartment was decorated to a reasonable level when I moved in so I just cleaned the place top to bottom and left it at that. I'm happy with it except my mum wants it decorated (and she will pay) and so we go through this same conversation every 6 months or so with me always saying 'no thanks'.

She can't ever be satisfied with her place. 'I need new curtains','the carpets need cleaning' (they were fine), 'this wall needs painting' (it was fine),'the front and back of the house need jet-washing'. I could go on. It's endless.




Last edited by Chucky; 09/24/20 10:03 AM.

“Dictators ride to and fro on tigers from which they dare not dismount. And the tigers are getting hungry.”
#4538325 - 09/25/20 04:59 AM Re: MEN ARE JUST HAPPIER PEOPLE [Re: NoFlyBoy]  
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thats why I never married again... being in a full time relationship means having to say sorry 10 times a day... and you find yourself burdened with trying to make SOMEBODY ELSE HAPPY...


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#4538326 - 09/25/20 05:36 AM Re: MEN ARE JUST HAPPIER PEOPLE [Re: NoFlyBoy]  
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My Wife is my life, We do it all together, She dies , I die.End of story.


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#4538419 - 09/25/20 08:53 PM Re: MEN ARE JUST HAPPIER PEOPLE [Re: NoFlyBoy]  
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Proposing to my wife was about the only wise decision I made as a teenager! eek2

++++++++++

Once again I post my 'clothes shopping with wife survival pack' (sans bottled water and gum) in pics below...

It's still the same except for replacement MP3 player. As long as I have a comfortable place to sit and get a little tease modelling. wink

BTW, my leather wallet was a groomsman's gift from my brother for being in his wedding (1984). Tough wallet, and incredible that I never lost it, at least not permanently.

Attached Files Fanny_Pack_1.JPGFanny_Pack_2.JPG


The rusty wire that holds the cork that keeps the anger in
Gives way and suddenly it’s day again
The sun is in the east
Even though the day is done
Two suns in the sunset, hmph
Could be the human race is run
#4538425 - 09/25/20 09:52 PM Re: MEN ARE JUST HAPPIER PEOPLE [Re: W-Molders]  
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Originally Posted by W-Molders
thats why I never married again... being in a full time relationship means having to say sorry 10 times a day... and you find yourself burdened with trying to make SOMEBODY ELSE HAPPY...


I'd have to agree with you. Married twice,divorced twice. Never again do I want to subject myself to that. Women are hard work. To those of you who have found your perfect partner,I am envious of you. I thought I had once...


“Dictators ride to and fro on tigers from which they dare not dismount. And the tigers are getting hungry.”
#4538441 - 09/25/20 11:58 PM Re: MEN ARE JUST HAPPIER PEOPLE [Re: NoFlyBoy]  
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I found a pretty good one once, I was just not ready to settle down...

Now?

LOL, I am so set in my ways, selfish actually, that I am no doubt much better off alone. I do enjoy flirting and playing with them, the vast majority WAY younger than I. I also enjoy advising the ones who ask.


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#4538467 - 09/26/20 11:09 AM Re: MEN ARE JUST HAPPIER PEOPLE [Re: NoFlyBoy]  
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Yesterday was a good day, the morning spent getting physicals and then off to wife's cardiologist. Our best results so far that I recall, plus wife once again told that she'd likely never need a valve repair (it was once estimated by age 60). This is after results from nuclear testing with a hard 15 min. treadmill stress run (preventative maintenance, genetic concerns).

Off to the track at sunrise, see how hard my inner Gunny and AC/DC can push me (hate falling behind the little woman...hurts my fragile male ego). biggrin



The rusty wire that holds the cork that keeps the anger in
Gives way and suddenly it’s day again
The sun is in the east
Even though the day is done
Two suns in the sunset, hmph
Could be the human race is run
#4538621 - 09/28/20 12:32 PM Re: MEN ARE JUST HAPPIER PEOPLE [Re: Nixer]  
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Originally Posted by Nixer
I found a pretty good one once, I was just not ready to settle down...

Now?

LOL, I am so set in my ways, selfish actually, that I am no doubt much better off alone. I do enjoy flirting and playing with them, the vast majority WAY younger than I. I also enjoy advising the ones who ask.



Heh, one of my long time friends at work recently confided with me that after two divorces he finally discovered that all he cared about was the sex. He said he would have saved himself a lot of money and stress had he realized that earlier. biggrin


“Whoever fights monsters should see to it that in the process he does not become a monster. And if you gaze long enough into an abyss, the abyss will gaze back into you.”
#4538623 - 09/28/20 12:58 PM Re: MEN ARE JUST HAPPIER PEOPLE [Re: NoFlyBoy]  
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Been through two wives and a girl friend that passed..Everyone thought I'd move back to CT but I like it here and enjoy living alone..I don't need another person to keep me happy I do have a miniature pincer named Iggy and she agrees with whatever I want to do.Low maintenance girl keep food in her bowl,,water and a few walks during the day..whatever movie I want to watch is OK she just curls up in the recliner and she looks and if the keyboard and joystick are in the chair she just curls up down by my feet


Russ
Semper Fi
#4538723 - 09/29/20 01:59 PM Re: MEN ARE JUST HAPPIER PEOPLE [Re: PanzerMeyer]  
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Originally Posted by PanzerMeyer
[quote=Nixer]Heh, one of my long time friends at work recently confided with me that after two divorces he finally discovered that all he cared about was the sex. He said he would have saved himself a lot of money and stress had he realized that earlier. biggrin


I wonder if he got married (at least the first time) to get sex, or was it for the steady stream? I can relate to both. biggrin

++++++++++

Reading back over thread... We all have different stories and solutions to finding happiness, or at least contentment.

Even as a non-religious person who never wanted to settle down in the traditional sense (picket fence and children), I attribute most of my marital satisfaction with sharing key conservative values. I fell in love with and married a conservative career woman, but the contradictions have worked for me.



The rusty wire that holds the cork that keeps the anger in
Gives way and suddenly it’s day again
The sun is in the east
Even though the day is done
Two suns in the sunset, hmph
Could be the human race is run

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