#4533185 - 08/11/20 03:45 AM
Going Under the Knife
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Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 1,649
FishTaco
Forever Cromulent
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Forever Cromulent
Member
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 1,649
Perth, Western Australia
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Off this week for my first real invasive surgery, have to have a hernia sorted out, and also from security work, to quote the surgeon: 'a few things need to be moved into the right places'.
For me, SimHQ has always been a place of confession, hence me writing this today. I've been lucky; I'm going on 54, and last time I had any surgery I was only five. Obviously from security etc, I've had breakages and dislocations that have been fixed. But this week I feel a bit weird.
No fear I swear, but in my mind I get a feeling that I'm not going to come back from this. It's hard to explain really. Not afraid at all, just a sense that perhaps I've had my time. I've put contingencies in place for my daughter in case anything does happen. I guess I'm thinking that I may get a repeat of what happened to my father; I mean, I worked with him and my uncle from 10 to 14, and like them both I was exposed to asbestos and inert gasses. Added to that when I was 35 I got pneumonia from stress, and my left lung deflated 70%. Discussed all of this with the surgeon and anesthetist, but still having these thoughts in my mind.
Has anybody else ever felt this way before? I'm in surgery this Friday.
Andrew.
Kindest regards,
AJ
"If you know the enemy and know yourself, your victory will not stand in doubt; if you know Heaven and know Earth, you may make your victory complete." - The Art of War - Sun Tzu
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#4533188 - 08/11/20 04:06 AM
Re: Going Under the Knife
[Re: FishTaco]
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Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 10,845
JimK
Veteran
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Veteran
Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 10,845
Spokane,WA
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Best of Luck Andrew. To be 54 again. How awesome that would be. That time, was when we were managing Garden Terrace Apts in New Ulm,MN. Hernia, OMG, my son has on has s similar condition and is only 24. Try not not think about the news, its only getting worse by the day.
BTW, son got married on July 24th. Marriage annulled tomorrow. Cheated on my son 2 weeks after with the best man who lives next door them. I am so pissed I was ready to drive 1500 miles and kill that kid. No morals in this world any more, and my son took care of her 3 old son more then she ever did.
59 is coming this November. Think it might be last the way its all going down.
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#4533189 - 08/11/20 04:09 AM
Re: Going Under the Knife
[Re: FishTaco]
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Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 9,569
Mr_Blastman
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Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 9,569
Atlanta, GA
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I had open heart surgery when I was 33, and my heart was completely disconnected from my body and I was iced down to be super cold, while my blood to my brain alone was fed through a machine. Sure, the surgery was quite a bit more extreme than yours, but I was scared and worried for weeks before I went in. The anxiety got so bad that I couldn't sleep at night, and this was at the height of the 2008 stock market crash and my career was... take a guess... a financial advisor. I had lost my Father six months earlier, and on the ides of March in 2009 I almost cracked, waiting for that day in early April where they'd fillet my breast bone and chop up my innards.
So what did I do?
I got on my knees and prayed. I gave up all my fears and worries to Lord Jesus and asked he take them away from me. I then met with my Minister and we had a good long talk, and was baptized a week or two later. After that prayer I had with the Lord, I slept better. Much better. The nights weren't as hairy a I felt a strange comfort, as ridiculous as this may sound to a non believer(not saying you are one, but I know some here are). He truly put my mind at ease.
So if you're a religious man, trust in the Lord. He has a plan for every one of us, whatever that may be. Let him take your hand and guide you and he'll do the rest.
Edit: The worst part of the anxiety was staring into that dark tunnel at night. You may know the one. Where you swear you're looking through Death's door into the cold, uncertain black, with absolute nothingness beyond and no sight of life on the other side. That was a scary place.
Last edited by Mr_Blastman; 08/11/20 04:14 AM.
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#4533190 - 08/11/20 04:10 AM
Re: Going Under the Knife
[Re: FishTaco]
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Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 1,649
FishTaco
Forever Cromulent
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Forever Cromulent
Member
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 1,649
Perth, Western Australia
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I feel you Jim.
Ex GF conned me and has caused me untold amounts of trouble. Discredited me, made 4 fake FB accounts about me, got me banned, lost me all of my FB friends by pretending to me. Threatened to go to the Philippines and snatch my daughter! And because she lives in Indonesia, a lot of our laws don't apply to her.
I know I'm on an open forum but I don't care, I could so easily fly to Indo and break her neck without any second thoughts.......you should NEVER make threats to me about my daughter.....
Kindest regards,
AJ
"If you know the enemy and know yourself, your victory will not stand in doubt; if you know Heaven and know Earth, you may make your victory complete." - The Art of War - Sun Tzu
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#4533191 - 08/11/20 04:17 AM
Re: Going Under the Knife
[Re: Mr_Blastman]
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Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 1,649
FishTaco
Forever Cromulent
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Forever Cromulent
Member
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 1,649
Perth, Western Australia
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I do pray, I was born a Christian, but over the past 10 years have turned more to Buddhism.
I won't start a debate, but a lot of times people use religion as an excuse. I guess because of my personal values and beliefs, that is what I am at a stage of acceptance. That should anything happen, I have had a reasonable, but sometimes difficult life, but that I am much luckier than many others.
I don't usually stray on the negative side, but my father had lung problems, but they did not become apparent until they did surgery on him. He was gone 4 days later. I guess the similarities are playing on me about my lungs.
Kindest regards,
AJ
"If you know the enemy and know yourself, your victory will not stand in doubt; if you know Heaven and know Earth, you may make your victory complete." - The Art of War - Sun Tzu
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#4533202 - 08/11/20 11:05 AM
Re: Going Under the Knife
[Re: FishTaco]
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Joined: Oct 1999
Posts: 8,839
Allen
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Joined: Oct 1999
Posts: 8,839
Ohio USA
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In 3 knee surgeries, I do remember fearing being "put under" for the procedures -- but, as the above post, I was not completely unconscious for one. I remember voicing my concerns as consciousness faded. The surgeries were 100% successful -- but, I always had extra bleeding due to low platelets.
My Mom had a positive story regarding serious hospitalizations -- and the differences between "negative prognosis", "concern", and "actual outcome".
At 72 she had her first "fatal" illness (cancer -- acted quickly -- surgery a week after detection). At 82 she had her 2'd fatal illness (heart attack -- they gave her two years at most). At 88 she had her third fatal illness (kidney failure -- they gave her a year). At 94 she had a "simple" stroke (affected doing mathematics). At 95, major heart failure requiring 911 and a pacemaker. At 97, old age finally caught up with her
My take: To worry is instinctive and perfectly normal. But, intellectually, stay as positive as possible.
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#4533207 - 08/11/20 12:09 PM
Re: Going Under the Knife
[Re: FishTaco]
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Joined: Nov 2001
Posts: 24,029
oldgrognard
Administrator
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Administrator
Lifer
Joined: Nov 2001
Posts: 24,029
USA
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Best wishes.
Worry is normal. Just don’t let worry turn into unreasoned fear. Most of these procedures are pretty routine with little risk.
Good people sleep peaceably in their beds at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf.
Someday your life will flash in front of your eyes. Make sure it is worth watching.
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#4533208 - 08/11/20 12:37 PM
Re: Going Under the Knife
[Re: FishTaco]
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Joined: Nov 2007
Posts: 4,612
KRT_Bong
It's KRT not Kurt
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It's KRT not Kurt
Senior Member
Joined: Nov 2007
Posts: 4,612
Sarasota, Florida
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It's been over a year now, but I had to go in for Hernia Surgery, two of them in fact. Umbilical and Inguinal, my belly button was distended out and 18" of small bowel in my scrotum, and yes it was as uncomfortable as it sounds and I went a year like that. After many Doctor visits and I dropped the first one because he quite honestly scared me, I decided I could not put it off any longer. I had to do all the prep myself to get cleaned out and went in early in the morning and was home in the afternoon. But up to that point I was a nervous wreck. I've already had the Colonoscopy thing twice and this was the first time I'd ever had a surgery other than Tonsils. I wouldn't worry, it should be fine. Small incision, Endoscope and a bit of mesh and a few stitches that will fall out on their own. In a couple weeks, you'll hardly notice it.
Windows 10 Pro Gigabyte 970A DS3P FX AMD FX6300 Vishera 3.5 Ghz ASUS STRIX GeForce GTX 970 Overclocked 4 GB DDR5 16Gb Patriot Viper 3 RAM DDR3 1866Mhz Onikuma Gaming Headset (has annoying blue lights I don't use)
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#4533246 - 08/11/20 05:44 PM
Re: Going Under the Knife
[Re: FishTaco]
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Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 1,649
FishTaco
Forever Cromulent
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Forever Cromulent
Member
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 1,649
Perth, Western Australia
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Thanks for all of the kind words everybody, great community we have here.
I have to fess up, I have an ongoing childhood fear of gas anesthetic. For me, because when I had my surgery at 5, I remember them holding me down and putting this god awful black rubber mask on me that made it feel like I was suffocating. Discussed it with the doc, and learnt some interesting things. Apparently, in the day, they used to put the mask on the kids but without letting the gas an oxygen flow, they specifically did this so that kids would panic, hyperventilate, and go under faster. Total bastards! So it wasn't my imagination after all.
Also for me, because I've done medical training, I'm fully aware of what they are going to do to me once I'm under. Doc told me it would probably be better if I didn't know.....LOL.
Anesthetist is a nice guy, ironically called Andrew as well. I discussed my fear in depth with him, because if I lose it and panic, 6'3 and 200lbs of going crazy Andrew is not going to be easy to calm down. We've made an agreement that prior to surgery, I will do the pre-breathing myself (strange that, I think the fear is more of not being in control) because I also used to SCUBA dive. He told me that they will mask me when I'm coming around, to make sure I'm getting pure oxygen. I've requested that they not do that; I will start breathing under my own steam.
Interesting fact, but backs up my fear.....
I believe in the '80's, a teen in the United States died during dental surgery, reason being that when they were administering the gas, the hoses got twisted together and cut off the oxygen. After that, I believe that the use of the full face masks was stopped. At least that is what I've read.
Thanks everybody for helping me to clear my mind; might make Friday and the weekend easier for me.
Kindest regards,
AJ
"If you know the enemy and know yourself, your victory will not stand in doubt; if you know Heaven and know Earth, you may make your victory complete." - The Art of War - Sun Tzu
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#4533324 - 08/12/20 02:05 PM
Re: Going Under the Knife
[Re: usafmtl]
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Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 1,649
FishTaco
Forever Cromulent
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Forever Cromulent
Member
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 1,649
Perth, Western Australia
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Good at the moment but still apprehensive about this surgery.
Going in on Friday morning a 06:00. What will happen after that, who knows?
Hope that you are also happy and well, couple of real SimHQ old timers here......LOL
Kindest regards,
AJ
"If you know the enemy and know yourself, your victory will not stand in doubt; if you know Heaven and know Earth, you may make your victory complete." - The Art of War - Sun Tzu
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#4533326 - 08/12/20 02:20 PM
Re: Going Under the Knife
[Re: FishTaco]
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Joined: Mar 2001
Posts: 17,301
Nixer
Scaliwag and Survivor
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Scaliwag and Survivor
Veteran
Joined: Mar 2001
Posts: 17,301
Living with the Trees
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Had a double hernia repair done, o0ne on each side, at age sixty four. No big deal here at all.
You got this.
Censored
Look for me on Twitter, Instagram, Facebook or Tic Toc...or anywhere you may frequent, besides SimHq, on the Global Scam Net. Aka, the internet. I am not there, never have been or ever will be, but the fruitless search may be more gratifying then the "content" you might otherwise be exposed to.
"There's a sucker born every minute." Phineas Taylor Barnum
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#4533333 - 08/12/20 03:45 PM
Re: Going Under the Knife
[Re: FishTaco]
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Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 1,649
FishTaco
Forever Cromulent
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Forever Cromulent
Member
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 1,649
Perth, Western Australia
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Thank Nixer :-)
Ironic that it's only the anesthetic that puts me on edge. In the past, I've had dislocations and broken bones reset with not being put out at all. Easy! But trying to conquer this one fear that I've has since five?
Send me back to Thailand. Approaching the tigers, and the cobras at the snake shows was nothing!
LOL
AJ.
Kindest regards,
AJ
"If you know the enemy and know yourself, your victory will not stand in doubt; if you know Heaven and know Earth, you may make your victory complete." - The Art of War - Sun Tzu
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#4533358 - 08/12/20 08:06 PM
Re: Going Under the Knife
[Re: FishTaco]
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Joined: Nov 2019
Posts: 6,529
NoFlyBoy
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Posts: 6,529
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I have heard of the saying you will give yourself a Hernia Mum said that to us if we weren't couch potatoes for at least an hour after a meal but I never knew exactly what it is. I gone and look it up. I would post the WIKI page but there are images there that might break rules. Again FishTaco, I say Godspeed and will Pray for you.
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