Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Rate This Thread
Hop To
#4487031 - 08/22/19 03:25 AM Lost my best friend  
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 12,934
NH2112 Online content
Veteran
NH2112  Online Content
Veteran

Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 12,934
Jackman, ME
I’ve known Lynn Schaffrick almost 20 years. Sunday afternoon her boyfriend found her in her home. Since I was the only one of her friends up here who knew her family, I made the calls to let them know. It was the hardest thing I’ve had to do in my life. I’m really a wreck, if it wasn’t for going to work and keeping too busy to think about her all the time I don’t know how I’d cope. Even though we were only friends, we were as close as any husband and wife. I lost a few girlfriends over our friendship. Though they weren’t much of a loss to me, I guess. I miss her so much.



Phil

"Live free or die: Death is not the worst of evils."
Inline advert (2nd and 3rd post)

#4487035 - 08/22/19 04:00 AM Re: Lost my best friend [Re: NH2112]  
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 4,556
Eugene Offline
Senior Member
Eugene  Offline
Senior Member

Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 4,556
Oregon
Phil, I am so sorry to hear that you've lost such a friend of a lifetime. Few losses cut this deep, or last so long. Words don't help much, but for what they are worth, friends make such a difference - and you must have been a terrific friend to her. I bet you have other friends who no doubt feel your pain. times like these, you kinda sorta find out who they are. Sadly, I just heard yesterday from a close and dear lady, known from old high school days - stage 3 colon cancer. I guess to have the joy, you got to have the pain, too. After these deep losses, I've come to believe I owe my daughter, my best friend, and the rest too - I owe them to embrace and enjoy opening my eyes in the morning, seeing the sky, feeling the wind.

Take care of yourself,

Eugene


Eugene

CoreDuo G620
ASUS P8Z68-V PRO
GeForce 1060
Creative Z
Win10
16 gig RAM
Cougar
#4487036 - 08/22/19 04:02 AM Re: Lost my best friend [Re: NH2112]  
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 26,064
wheelsup_cavu Offline
Lifer
wheelsup_cavu  Offline
Lifer

Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 26,064
Corona, California
You have my condolences Phil. Losing a close friend is never something one is prepared to have happen.
Do your best to remember the good/great times you shared over those twenty years.


Wheels


Cheers wave
Wheelsup_cavu

Mission4Today (Campaigns, Missions, and Skins for IL-2)
Planes of Fame Air Museum | March Field Air Museum | Palm Springs Air Museum
#4487065 - 08/22/19 12:52 PM Re: Lost my best friend [Re: NH2112]  
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 6,580
bones Offline
Hotshot
bones  Offline
Hotshot

Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 6,580
Earth
So sorry for your loss.

v6,
boNes


"Also, I would prefer a back seater over the extra gas any day. I would have 80 pounds of flesh to eat and a pair of glasses to start a fire." --F/A-18 Hornet pilot
#4487066 - 08/22/19 01:01 PM Re: Lost my best friend [Re: NH2112]  
Joined: Jul 2009
Posts: 6,823
CyBerkut Online content
Administrator
CyBerkut  Online Content
Administrator
Hotshot

Joined: Jul 2009
Posts: 6,823
Florida
I am sorry to hear of your loss, Phil. 48 is too young for that to make any sense.

#4487068 - 08/22/19 01:04 PM Re: Lost my best friend [Re: NH2112]  
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 109,070
PanzerMeyer Offline
Pro-Consul of Florida
PanzerMeyer  Offline
Pro-Consul of Florida
King Crimson - SimHQ's Top Poster

Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 109,070
Miami, FL USA
My condolences Phil. I'm sorry about the huge loss.


“Whoever fights monsters should see to it that in the process he does not become a monster. And if you gaze long enough into an abyss, the abyss will gaze back into you.”
#4487070 - 08/22/19 01:23 PM Re: Lost my best friend [Re: NH2112]  
Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 5,509
Bill_Grant Offline
Hotshot
Bill_Grant  Offline
Hotshot

Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 5,509
Dallas, TX
I am sorry for what you are having to go through.
I hope you can find some peace today, and recall the great things about her that will bring you comfort


~Bill

Stop Global Whining!
#4487071 - 08/22/19 01:30 PM Re: Lost my best friend [Re: NH2112]  
Joined: Mar 2001
Posts: 15,336
Nixer Offline
Scaliwag and Survivor
Nixer  Offline
Scaliwag and Survivor
Veteran

Joined: Mar 2001
Posts: 15,336
Living with the Trees
So sorry for your loss Phil.

Sounds like she was a great lady.


"I have but one lamp by which my feet are guided, and that is the lamp of experience. I know no way of judging of the future but by the past."
Patrick Henry 1775

I personally believe in the tooth fairy, Santa Claus and that deficit spending is sustainable forever. We really do need more Admirals in the Navy than ships and that millions of more poor immigrants will jump start the economy.

"There's a sucker born every minute."
Phineas Taylor Barnum

#4487130 - 08/22/19 09:39 PM Re: Lost my best friend [Re: NH2112]  
Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 2,588
462cid Offline
Senior Member
462cid  Offline
Senior Member

Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 2,588
USA
Very sorry to hear this Phil. I think I can begin to understand how you must feel.

It is rare for a young man to be mature enough to understand that a female in his life occupies a special place like that. I have been lucky enough to be in a similar situation for 26 years with a woman I met when I was 22 and she was 20. I've known her as long as her husband. I used to get black looks from other guys when I'd take her somewhere before her marriage, she was so striking. But we were and always will be wrong for each other, romantically. I too had some dating issues because of that strong friendship, and many comments besides, but that's what we do for genuine, worthwhile and good people because they are rare. That's the point, since our real friends are pretty much family that we can choose and they are not as commonly found as we would like or even need.

I do know with certainty that you were and are a better person because of your friend and that you filled that same role for her. You are both fortunate to have had that happen. Stay strong.


What kind of car is that? What does it matter? When I drive it, I'm Steve McQueen
#4487267 - 08/23/19 08:50 PM Re: Lost my best friend [Re: NH2112]  
Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 24,821
RSColonel_131st Offline
Lifer
RSColonel_131st  Offline
Lifer

Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 24,821
Vienna, 2nd rock left.
Sorry to read that Phil. The way you descripe your friendship sounds like not only she for you, but also you for her have been a very valuable companion in life. And that is rare, even more so between man and woman.

Try and find some time for yourself to heal that wound. I wish you and her family all the best.

#4487281 - 08/23/19 10:09 PM Re: Lost my best friend [Re: NH2112]  
Joined: Nov 2001
Posts: 20,155
oldgrognard Online content
Administrator
oldgrognard  Online Content
Administrator
Lifer

Joined: Nov 2001
Posts: 20,155
USA
I have great sympathy for your loss. It is terrible to lose a close friend. Words have little worth.


Good people sleep peaceably in their beds at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf.

Someday your life will flash in front of your eyes. Make sure it is worth watching.
#4487287 - 08/23/19 11:20 PM Re: Lost my best friend [Re: NH2112]  
Joined: May 2002
Posts: 6,147
Tarnsman Offline
Hotshot
Tarnsman  Offline
Hotshot

Joined: May 2002
Posts: 6,147
USA
I am very sorry for the loss of your dear friend. Please accept my deepest sympathies.

#4487293 - 08/23/19 11:49 PM Re: Lost my best friend [Re: NH2112]  
Joined: Sep 2001
Posts: 24,408
Dart Online smile
Measured in Llamathrusts
Dart  Online Smile
Measured in Llamathrusts
Lifer

Joined: Sep 2001
Posts: 24,408
Alabaster, AL USA
My condolences.


The opinions of this poster are largely based on facts and portray a possible version of the actual events.

More dumb stuff at http://www.darts-page.com

From Laser:
"The forum is the place where combat (real time) flight simulator fans come to play turn based strategy combat."
#4487399 - 08/25/19 01:17 AM Re: Lost my best friend [Re: NH2112]  
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 12,934
NH2112 Online content
Veteran
NH2112  Online Content
Veteran

Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 12,934
Jackman, ME
Thanks, everyone, it’s been a hell of a week. I keep thinking I’ll hear my alarm going off and wake up from the worst dream imaginable. What’s really hard is I have to drive by her house every time I go anywhere. But the hardest thing of all is we hadn’t talked for about 5 months because we had a pretty bad fight. I was still angry with her, but in reality I think I was just making myself stay angry at her because I wanted to be. So take it from me - don’t do that, because you never know when you’ll end up living the rest of your life regretting your pettiness and stupidity.

Last Saturday night she appeared in a dream. I didn’t remember a single detail about the dream except for that. I mentioned it to a FB friend because dreaming about her was very unusual for me. I doubt I had done it 10 times in all the years I knew her. What was weird was she looked exactly like she did in real life, which is unusual for me. In my dreams I know who people are but there are usually subtle but definite differences in their appearance. Her boyfriend also had a dream with her in it that night. A goodbye? I don’t know. It would almost be worse knowing she was no longer angry with me.

Last edited by NH2112; 08/25/19 01:21 AM.

Phil

"Live free or die: Death is not the worst of evils."
#4487545 - 08/26/19 01:45 PM Re: Lost my best friend [Re: NH2112]  
Joined: Jul 2009
Posts: 732
BlueHeron Offline
Member
BlueHeron  Offline
Member

Joined: Jul 2009
Posts: 732
Ottawa, Canada
Man, so sorry to hear that. The world is just not the same when we lose someone so close. frown

#4487555 - 08/26/19 03:20 PM Re: Lost my best friend [Re: NH2112]  
Joined: Oct 2012
Posts: 483
Fittop Offline
Member
Fittop  Offline
Member

Joined: Oct 2012
Posts: 483
US
My condolences.
Having experienced a similar loss, I can say it may not get easier. one just seems to get more used to living with the loss and strong memories.
Yes, the dreams somehow help, even if that does not seem to make sense.

#4487990 - 08/30/19 07:11 PM Re: Lost my best friend [Re: NH2112]  
Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 10,328
shan2 Offline
Veteran
shan2  Offline
Veteran

Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 10,328
Maryland, USA
I'm sorry for your loss. frown


You're only young once, but you can be immature forever.
#4488111 - 09/01/19 04:45 AM Re: Lost my best friend [Re: NH2112]  
Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 115
Fracture Offline
Member
Fracture  Offline
Member

Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 115
Ohio
I know it doesn't get any easier but at least you're not alone. Take care.

#4489058 - 09/11/19 07:23 AM Re: Lost my best friend [Re: NH2112]  
Joined: May 2006
Posts: 3,638
HeinKill Offline
Senior Member
HeinKill  Offline
Senior Member

Joined: May 2006
Posts: 3,638
Cloud based
Sorry to hear. Lost my best friend a couple of years back. I found it helps to keep a photo of him in my travel wallet, which I use frequently. I enjoy randomly seeing it in there and thinking about the good times we had - it's a way of honouring the friendship and his memory. ATB, Fred


[Linked Image]

Moderated by  RacerGT 

Quick Search
Recent Articles
Support SimHQ

If you shop on Amazon use this Amazon link to support SimHQ
.
Social


Recent Topics
New Midway Movie
by Barkhorn1x. 09/15/19 05:52 PM
Comparison of Apollo 11 Descent Film and LRO Images
by Mark Aisthorpe. 09/14/19 07:13 PM
Eddie Money RIP
by JimK. 09/13/19 06:27 PM
Tropical Storm Warning for NW Bahamas
by Haggart. 09/12/19 10:20 PM
Sacha Baron Cohen in "The Spy"
by letterboy1. 09/12/19 07:07 PM
Can you spot the gaffe?
by PanzerMeyer. 09/12/19 03:21 PM
Love it our here. Seen a huge plane
by JimK. 09/12/19 12:53 AM
September 11,2001
by rwatson. 09/11/19 10:56 AM
Some good old movies are awful
by 462cid. 09/10/19 10:05 PM
Copyright 1997-2016, SimHQ Inc. All Rights Reserved.

Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 7.6.0