Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Rate This Thread
Hop To
#4410691 - 03/15/18 02:06 PM Church Bells joke....  
Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 5,864
Bill_Grant Offline
Hotshot
Bill_Grant  Offline
Hotshot

Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 5,864
Dallas, TX
Upon hearing that her elderly grandfather had just passed away, Katie went straight to her grandparent’s house to visit her 95-year-old grandmother and comfort her.

When she asked how her grandfather had died, her grandmother replied, “He had a heart attack while we were making love on Sunday morning.”

Horrified, Katie told her grandmother that two people nearly 100 years old having sex was surely asking for trouble.

“Oh, no, my dear,” replied Granny. “Many years ago, realizing our advanced age, we figured out the best time to do it was when the church bells would start to ring. It was just the right rhythm.
Nice and slow and even. Nothing too strenuous, simply in on the Ding and out on the Dong.”

She paused to wipe away a tear, and said, “He’d still be alive if that damned’ ice cream truck hadn’t come along.”


~Bill

In my defense, I was left unsupervised...
Inline advert (2nd and 3rd post)

#4410699 - 03/15/18 02:24 PM Re: Church Bells joke.... [Re: Bill_Grant]  
Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 25,138
RSColonel_131st Offline
Lifer
RSColonel_131st  Offline
Lifer

Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 25,138
Vienna, 2nd rock left.
rofl

#4410700 - 03/15/18 02:25 PM Re: Church Bells joke.... [Re: Bill_Grant]  
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 121,384
PanzerMeyer Offline
Pro-Consul of Florida
PanzerMeyer  Offline
Pro-Consul of Florida
King Crimson - SimHQ's Top Poster

Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 121,384
Miami, FL USA
LOL!! That joke is so wrong but so funny.


“Whoever fights monsters should see to it that in the process he does not become a monster. And if you gaze long enough into an abyss, the abyss will gaze back into you.”
#4410704 - 03/15/18 02:44 PM Re: Church Bells joke.... [Re: Bill_Grant]  
Joined: Apr 2000
Posts: 2,785
Wallimiyama Offline
Senior Member
Wallimiyama  Offline
Senior Member

Joined: Apr 2000
Posts: 2,785
Just south of the North Pole (...
biggrin


Wally
-Are we havin' fun yet?
#4410708 - 03/15/18 03:01 PM Re: Church Bells joke.... [Re: Bill_Grant]  
Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 13,225
No105_Archie Offline
No105_Archie  Offline

Veteran

Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 13,225
N. Atlantic east of Canada
biggrin


Archie Smythe

carpe diem
#4410813 - 03/15/18 10:45 PM Re: Church Bells joke.... [Re: Bill_Grant]  
Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 5,304
WOLF257 Offline
Professional Cynic
WOLF257  Offline
Professional Cynic
Hotshot

Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 5,304
Alabama
rofl


WOLF

You are what you do when it counts

I will do terrible things to protect myself and all that I've worked for.
But even in your deepest, darkest nightmares you can't imagine the horrific things I'll do to protect my family.

#4411788 - 03/20/18 11:31 PM Re: Church Bells joke.... [Re: Bill_Grant]  
Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 4,585
coasty Offline
Senior Member
coasty  Offline
Senior Member

Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 4,585
Asheville, NC, USA
we live next to a church with chimes, I think I can spot an ice cream truck with any luck...


Have you seen the Arrow? WWW
#4411838 - 03/21/18 06:11 AM Re: Church Bells joke.... [Re: Bill_Grant]  
Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 8,556
Li'lJugs Offline
Hotshot
Li'lJugs  Offline
Hotshot

Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 8,556
St. Cloud MN USA
I don't get it?

biggrin


Hi, I'm Larry and this my brother Dayrle, and this is my other brother Dayrle.
#4411905 - 03/21/18 02:28 PM Re: Church Bells joke.... [Re: Li'lJugs]  
Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 2,760
BD-123 Offline
Old Scroat
BD-123  Offline
Old Scroat
Senior Member

Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 2,760
Naunton Beauchamp Worcestershi...
Originally Posted by Li'lJugs
I don't get it?

biggrin

Neither did the Granny after the fast and furious pace of the truck's jingle caused her hubby to expire smile



#4411906 - 03/21/18 02:39 PM Re: Church Bells joke.... [Re: Bill_Grant]  
Joined: Apr 2002
Posts: 5,503
Pooch Offline
Hotshot
Pooch  Offline
Hotshot

Joined: Apr 2002
Posts: 5,503
Orlando, FL
No, actually, she got it. Just more of IT than she expected!


"From our orbital vantage point, we observe an earth without borders, full of peace, beauty and magnificence, and we pray that humanity as a whole can imagine a borderless world as we see it, and strive to live as one in peace."
Astronaut William C. McCool RIP, January 29, 2003 - Space Shuttle Columbia


Moderated by  RacerGT 

Quick Search
Recent Articles
Support SimHQ

If you shop on Amazon use this Amazon link to support SimHQ
.
Social


Recent Topics
Carnival Cruise Ship Fire....... Again
by F4UDash4. 03/26/24 05:58 PM
Baltimore Bridge Collapse
by F4UDash4. 03/26/24 05:51 PM
The Oldest WWII Veterans
by F4UDash4. 03/24/24 09:21 PM
They got fired after this.
by Wigean. 03/20/24 08:19 PM
Grown ups joke time
by NoFlyBoy. 03/18/24 10:34 PM
Anyone Heard from Nimits?
by F4UDash4. 03/18/24 10:01 PM
RIP Gemini/Apollo astronaut Tom Stafford
by semmern. 03/18/24 02:14 PM
10 years after 3/8/2014
by NoFlyBoy. 03/17/24 10:25 AM
Copyright 1997-2016, SimHQ Inc. All Rights Reserved.

Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 7.6.0