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#4276685 - 07/07/16 12:55 AM Has no one else noticed this conspiracy?  
Joined: Jan 2013
Posts: 1,204
DrZebra Offline
DrZebra  Offline

Joined: Jan 2013
Posts: 1,204
You see, spacecadets, Im a private investigating Zebra for years know, and suspicion has always been part of my trade..

So, naturally, when the shere amount of "reboot a com-relay" missions popped up, I smelled the foul play like old synthfish out of the trashcompactor.

Thousends and thousends of young, inexperienced young new captains traveling thousands and thousands of miles to push a button. Again and Again and again and again?

No signal trigered reboots, no dead man switches, where you send a signal, and upon not receiving that properly, have an automated reboot inicialised? Basics from engineering, first year everyone forgot? There had to be a deeper story behind this.

So I looked through the files.. and a whopping 99.9% of young inexperienced pilots encounters pirates. Numbers like from a 20th century comunist election, too good to be true.

So naturally, I first suspected a wealthy pirate might have invested in stocks and and used his influence to keep that feature, the outside reset button, that makes any engineer cry like he was in marketing. You know, the one guy, that is now in buisness but does his buddies a favour and gets his cut..

But then I started digging deeper. What actually happens to those always-there Pirates?

They LOSE. Big time. I did not expect that. So it had to be something else.. The gambling people where next on my list. You know, betting on the survival odds of Noobs vs Piratenoobs might really be good buisness. And if there is anything Ive learned as a private dick it is: "if it aint the pirate, its the gambler"

But even then, I had to dig deeper. The pirates lose to consistently for any serious gambling, low quota, low profit. Old rule. You see, I like ancient history like those 20th centuries things. And gambling rules arent new.

Next up, I had to look for the Manufacturers. The sheer amount of spaceships lost in those "reboot operations" should mean serious money, right? Turnes out, Im wrong again.. the manufacturing mafia runs their own sheme with those races, where they let any idiot crash his #%&*$# at high speed.. and those are new ships, while the noob pirates have pre-owned vessels, I checked their history.

That only leaves one suspect. THE BANKS. If it aint the pirate, and it aint the gambler... its a banker. I know my buisness. "Why?" you ask? Think about it: what is the real shortage in our universe. It isnt machines nor raw materials, it isnt automated manufacturing capabilities. IT`S PEOPLE! Independent, creative actors, that can do what what economic actors do: work and create wealth, like no machine can. If you sell them #%&*$# ships on credit, and have a significant portion of them lose it on first mission.. you own their asses by interest rate. Owing by debt, better then slavery, they dont revolt and do act all on their own to pay you back an unbackpayable interest.. for life.

I gotta stop here, I see black spaceships outside.

written for reddit:

#4277459 - 07/09/16 12:39 AM Re: Has no one else noticed this conspiracy? [Re: DrZebra]  
Joined: Apr 2000
Posts: 1,880
K6_Scorpion Offline
Ruler of the Free World
K6_Scorpion  Offline
Ruler of the Free World

Joined: Apr 2000
Posts: 1,880
Central FL
nice job!

<Uh... put signature here... and stuff>

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