Like CG2015, I would be totally lost where to start looking again.
That's just it- this is where males screw up, they're 'out looking.' It's the other way around, the females come to you. The guys who are most appealing are the guys who don't look as though they are out looking, they are out living their lives, and that's suddenly when 'magically' girls start taking notice and do more the approaching.
Dating is phenomenally easier than long term relationships, but the problems happen when we don't treat dating as fun and light in and of itself, we treat it as a serious matter to find that one person, then it becomes much harder. All the pressure is on. That's when males start their approval seeking routines, they don't really behave as they really are. They'll act nicer to girls they think are more attractive or that they want, more dismissive of women they don't like, and women notice this stuff, and they can tell when the guys are trying too hard but not acting naturally.
The mentality to have in dating is that you have to be willing to lose the girl in order to win her, that means the stuff that seems counter-intuitive is what women are more attracted to- the guys don't act nicer than they really they are, and they give off a different vibe- a lover than that of a friend who is trying to get her approval, and that's difficult for lots of guys, their only routine is to be nice and make themselves available.
Here's an example- a guy makes plans with friends, and then a girl he likes makes contact with him and invites him to go somewhere. Like a lot of guys, he may change his plans to go with the girl- this is not what guys should do, again, it's approval seeking behavior and it makes the guy look too available. The thing to do in this situation is to either decline and ask for a date at another time, or invite the girl
to come along with- no pressure, she can take it or leave it. But to modify behavior gives off signals to women that the guy is easy, likewise, the female threshold is rather low and a girl comes off more desperate and easy if she's always available and agreeable to what the guy says. You know this intuitively that if someone is always available and agrees with everything you say comes off a bit creepy. Something wrong there, you have to not do that.
The way the dynamics look like is game of push and pull- push the girl to get her interest up, take two steps forward, then she'll start putting her guard up as she realizes you are communicating interest. Then take a step back, this leaves her feeling as though she's putting her guard up for no reason, and you're safe and comfortable. She'll drop her guard, and then when she reaches out to you to find out what happened to you, do it again- two steps forward to get her interests up, then pull back a little. Keep doing it, and keep dating many other women regardless of your level of interest in any of them- that makes your life busy and involved and makes you more appealing and comfortable with dating and more women will come into your path. It also makes you more comfortable around all types of women and you get a sense of what female behavior is really trying to do so you pass their tests and remain immune to their games designed to weed out guys who don't know what they're doing (or may be dangerous). Easy. But guys find that difficult to do- they only date and pursue the few girls they think they have lots of interest in, and that vibe comes off much differently. It's a 'scarce mentality'- the one or two girls are likely the only ones he meets, or he doesn't meet many girls too often, so he tends to pursue harder, and it shows.