geez....guess I'm not visiting there any time soon!
Dude, if you ever seriously decide you want to make the trip (and we can plan far enough in advance), then I'll go along and be your translator/guide/chair-pusher/whatever.... We'll round up a few others and make it happen.
EDIT: Somehow Matt Wagner managed to get around with a little help from his friends. And nobody in that place does anything without some help from friends, believe me.