#3165994 - 12/26/10 07:52 PM
Viagra Is Now Obsolete!
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Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 5,872
Sauron
Successor to Bill the Cat!
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Successor to Bill the Cat!
Hotshot
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 5,872
Quantum Superstate
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Yep, no need for Viagra anymore! Now they can fix you!"Yeah, if we can get the parts, we should have it ready for you by Tuesday!" Cheers! Rick... 
"We are extending ourselves in Space and Time not because of capitalism or socialism but in spite of them. The Right/Left Capitalist/Socialist establishments are psychologically unprepared for our emerging situation in Time and Space." - F. M. Esfandiary, Upwingers
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#3166077 - 12/26/10 11:16 PM
Re: Viagra Is Now Obsolete!
[Re: Sauron]
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Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 26,564
wheelsup_cavu
Lifer
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Lifer
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 26,564
Corona, California
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Yep, no need for Viagra anymore! Now they can fix you!"Yeah, if we can get the parts, we should have it ready for you by Tuesday!" Cheers! Rick... Actually you aren't far off the mark Sauron. Not to get too graphic but right before Viagra was introduced I was getting ready to sign a contract to make implants. Viagra destroyed that company by making their product obsolete. Wheels
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#3166089 - 12/26/10 11:33 PM
Re: Viagra Is Now Obsolete!
[Re: Sauron]
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Joined: Nov 2007
Posts: 3,674
EinsteinEP
Just a Noob
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Just a Noob
Senior Member
Joined: Nov 2007
Posts: 3,674
Tucson, AZ
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I guess every job they get is a "fixer-upper", eh?
Shoot to Kill.
Play to Have Fun.
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#3166131 - 12/27/10 12:34 AM
Re: Viagra Is Now Obsolete!
[Re: Sauron]
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Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 10,343
shan2
Veteran
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Veteran
Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 10,343
Maryland, USA
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Back when I was working in an oncology department, there were an awful lot of prostate cancer surgeries. Quite a few of them ended up damaging the erectile tissue/mechanism so that the patients were permanently afflicted with impotence. (Did I just hear hundreds of SimHQers scream, "DEATH FIRST!") At any rate, the patients who desired "function" again were presented with two options: a semirigid flexible insert (kinda like a Slinky for your penis) or a pneumatic pump system that inflated a bladder inserted into the penis. The pump system allowed people to...shall we say...select a particular size and hardness. Of course, people being the creatures that they are, there were some abuses. After the first dozen or so patients blew up their penises by pumping them too much, emergency bleed valves were installed in later revisions.
edit:
Oh, yeah. I forgot to mention--the pump mechanism was typically installed in the patient's scrotum. You had to be kinda careful during the inflation procedure...
Last edited by shan2; 12/27/10 12:36 AM.
You're only young once, but you can be immature forever.
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#3166142 - 12/27/10 12:48 AM
Re: Viagra Is Now Obsolete!
[Re: shan2]
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Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 5,872
Sauron
Successor to Bill the Cat!
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Successor to Bill the Cat!
Hotshot
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 5,872
Quantum Superstate
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After the first dozen or so patients blew up their penises by pumping them too much, emergency bleed valves were installed in later revisions.
edit:
Oh, yeah. I forgot to mention--the pump mechanism was typically installed in the patient's scrotum. You had to be kinda careful during the inflation procedure... "Honey, what was that noise?" "Call 911! I was squeezing my nuts and my crank exploded!" "911 services, what is the nature of your emergency?" Cheers! Rick... 
"We are extending ourselves in Space and Time not because of capitalism or socialism but in spite of them. The Right/Left Capitalist/Socialist establishments are psychologically unprepared for our emerging situation in Time and Space." - F. M. Esfandiary, Upwingers
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#3166151 - 12/27/10 12:59 AM
Re: Viagra Is Now Obsolete!
[Re: Sauron]
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Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 5,872
Sauron
Successor to Bill the Cat!
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Successor to Bill the Cat!
Hotshot
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 5,872
Quantum Superstate
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Gives new meaning to the Slinky jingle, eh? "What walks down stairs, alone or in pairs, And makes a slinkity sound? A spring, a spring, a marvelous thing, Everyone knows it’s Slinky! It's Slinky, it's Slinky, for fun it's a wonderful toy! It's Slinky, it's Slinky, the favorite of girls and boys! Everyone wants a Slinky! You ought to get a Slinky!" "Hey! What's that thing walking down the stairs, making a slinkity sound?" Added to Shopping List: One industrial size bottle of extra strength Saw Palmetto extract. Cheers! Rick...
"We are extending ourselves in Space and Time not because of capitalism or socialism but in spite of them. The Right/Left Capitalist/Socialist establishments are psychologically unprepared for our emerging situation in Time and Space." - F. M. Esfandiary, Upwingers
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#3166157 - 12/27/10 01:07 AM
Re: Viagra Is Now Obsolete!
[Re: Sauron]
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Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 10,343
shan2
Veteran
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Veteran
Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 10,343
Maryland, USA
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Hey, don't knock it. The insert made the only men in the world who were ready to salute at any time.  Not even Ron Jeremy could get it up and at 'em faster.
You're only young once, but you can be immature forever.
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#3166234 - 12/27/10 04:07 AM
Re: Viagra Is Now Obsolete!
[Re: Sauron]
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Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 2,534
TDog
Senior Member
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Senior Member
Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 2,534
WI, USA
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For some reason the Otto-pilot scene from Airplane keeps coming to mind.
"Let's get out of here before one of those things kills Guy."
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Exodus
by RedOneAlpha. 04/18/24 05:46 PM
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