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#3099095 - 09/22/10 05:00 PM Marriage in the later years  
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Arthonon Offline
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The wife and I were sitting around the breakfast table one lazy Sunday morning.
I said to her, "If I were to die suddenly, I want you to immediately sell all my stuff."
"Now why would you want me to do something like that?" she asked.
So I said, "I figure that you would eventually remarry, and I don't want some a--hole using my stuff."
She looked at me straightforwardly, and answered: "What makes you think I'd marry another a--hole?"


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#3099096 - 09/22/10 05:01 PM Re: Marriage in the later years [Re: Arthonon]  
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PanzerMeyer Online centaurian
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#3099097 - 09/22/10 05:02 PM Re: Marriage in the later years [Re: Arthonon]  
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#3099278 - 09/22/10 08:15 PM Re: Marriage in the later years [Re: Arthonon]  
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- Ice Offline
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#3099358 - 09/22/10 10:09 PM Re: Marriage in the later years [Re: Arthonon]  
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Gopher Offline
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#3099816 - 09/23/10 05:41 PM Re: Marriage in the later years [Re: Arthonon]  
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Grisbeau Offline
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Lancashire,UK
The couple were 85 years old and had been married for sixty years. Though they were far from rich, they managed to get by because they watched their pennies.
Though not young, they were both in very good health, largely due to the wifes insistence on healthy foods and exercise for the last decade.
One day, their good health didnt help when they went on a rare vacation and their plane crashed, sending them off to Heaven.
They reached the pearly gates, and St.. Peter escorted them inside. He took them to a beautiful mansion, furnished in gold and fine silks, with a fully stocked kitchen and a waterfall in the master bath. A maid could be seen hanging their favourite clothes in the closet.
They gasped in astonishment when he said, Welcome to Heaven. This will be your home now.
The old man asked Peter how much all this was going to cost. Why, nothing, Peter replied, remember, this is your reward in Heaven..
The old man looked out the window and right there he saw a championship golf course, finer and more beautiful than any ever built on Earth..
What are the greens fees?, grumbled the old man.
This is heaven, St. Peter replied. You can play for free, every day.
Next they went to the clubhouse and saw the lavish buffet lunch, with every imaginable cuisine laid out before them, from seafood to steaks to exotic deserts, free flowing beverages.
Dont even ask, said St. Peter to the man.. This is Heaven, it is all free for you to enjoy.
The old man looked around and glanced nervously at his wife.
Well, where are the low fat and low cholesterol foods and the decaffeinated tea?, he asked.
Thats the best part, St. Peter replied.. You can eat and drink as much as you like of whatever you like and you will never get fat or sick. This is Heaven!
The old man pushed, No gym to work out at?
Not unless you want to, was the answer.
No testing my sugar or blood pressure or.
Never again. All you do here is enjoy yourself.
The old man glared at his wife and said, You and your flipping bran flakes. We could have been here ten years ago!

#3099917 - 09/23/10 07:27 PM Re: Marriage in the later years [Re: Arthonon]  
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Mace71 Offline
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Darlington, UK.
Lol, both good ones smile


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