Folks,

Dux:

So that is where you got off to.

By the time I arrived at the P&P there was no one left but an elderly man passed out in a corner and 2 teetotalers who came in just to use the gents. I asked if there had been a raid by the constabulary but most of those fellows were said to be in the backroom of the pub across the street. Where was everybody?

I felt lonely and unhappy at missing the celebration. Feeling lonely makes me thirsty so I had a pint, and then another. Just as I was about to order a bucket, who should pop in but that lovely film star...what's her name? You know, the platinum blond one who made that American cowboy film with...um...whose his face..you know, the big one with the thin mustache and the Australian accent.

Anyhow her Bentley had broken down and she desperately needed someone to give her a lift to Pinewood Studios. Did I mention that she was wearing a dress with a deeply plunging neckline and a split up the side all the way to her.... I was free at the moment so I instantly offered her a ride to anywhere. Quite right, I had no car of my own but there was a lovely new one conveniently parked right across the street. We borrowed that car and we were soon happily on our way, our hair blowing in the wind and my heart beating the fastest part of The Flight of the Bumblebee.

Well, the short story is that, along about the 3rd chorus of Flight of The Bumblebee, we were stopped by the cops along a paved road just outside Studley Grange. Once we were pulled over they took great pains in calling our attention to the POLICE sign printed in large block letters on the side of our car. I do not know how we could have missed that.

About the time I was visualizing the tar and feathers being mixed up, the arresting bobbies got a load of my passenger, and my hopes brightened a bit. Sure enough, in the time it takes to say Rin Tin Tin, the lovely thing was whisked away to her appointment with that famous director...you know.. Cecil B. somebody. Anyway, I was left standing there in the dark, lonely again but a free man. I just stood there in the wet street waving goodbye and counting myself lucky indeed not to be spending at least a month cleaning tar off my body and plucking feathers out of my.... I sighed. I knew it was going to be a long, lonely walk home. And then it started to rain.



Originally Registered January,2001 Member Number 3044

"Blessed are they who expect nothing, for they shall not be disappointed" - Edmond Gwenn, "The Trouble With Harry"

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