We have already allowed for some beastly Gaelic/Celtic trickery and have arranged for our own supply of medicinal alcohol which we will be taking with us. The winds in the Trossachs can be penetrating and there is nothing like a good rubdown - inside and out - with McDewar's Stag Bile double malt 20 year preparation.
Our safe transit across the Highlands could hardly be entrusted to a vulnerable motor car or even the sturdy Land Rover. Oh dear me no! - nay - never. I just knew that one day that souvenier which my dear old dad's mate brought back from Normandy would one day come in useful and one which pater obtained for ten Woodbines, a British Army magazine with articles and pictures of male interest, a bent Iron Cross, Herman Goering's diet sheet and a lavatory roll holder from Berchtesgaden.
I am of course refering to the 8 ton SdKfz 251 Schultzenpanzerwagen half-track with 37mm self-propelled gun and MG14 backup rib tickler. 60 years worth of hen dropping encrustations have been lovingly scraped from the anti-magnetic paste coating and four boxes of fossilized bratwurst and a few bottles of near fatal Schnapps have been donated to the Imperial War Museum at Duxford. This ex Wehrmacht apparatus is now primed for a mission which will equal anything experienced on the Russian Front and with the driver's seat specially reinforced to accomodate Olga's broad arse can now safely be assumed to be ready for action.
'Find your enemy and shoot him down - everything else is unimportant.'
