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Did the Ewoks eat the stormtroopers?

Posted By: Discord

Did the Ewoks eat the stormtroopers? - 08/29/08 11:02 PM

I was wondering if the Ewoks ate the stormtroopers in Return of the Jedi.
Posted By: Colt40Five

Re: Did the Ewoks eat the stormtroopers? - 08/30/08 12:08 AM

I like to think so....with some fava beans and a nice chianti...ftfhftfhftfhftfhftfh
Posted By: Billzilla

Re: Did the Ewoks eat the stormtroopers? - 08/30/08 01:44 AM

Hell yeah, they roast up very nicely in those pretty white suits.
Posted By: Clydewinder

Re: Did the Ewoks eat the stormtroopers? - 08/30/08 02:12 AM

I would think that they probably tucked most of them away in their little tree trunks to save for the winter. In sure a few were served up that night in the "We defeated the Empire with Logs" celebration. I wonder if they snuck a few bites of Bar-B-Q'd Vader while Luke was busy making out with his sister.
Posted By: PanzerMeyer

Re: Did the Ewoks eat the stormtroopers? - 08/30/08 05:14 AM

 Originally Posted By: Discord
I was wondering if the Ewoks ate the stormtroopers in Return of the Jedi.


An anthropological analysis of the Ewok tribal culture would indicate that this would be possible as implied by the scene where Luke and Han were tied to wooden sticks and were being prepared to be roasted at C3PO's ceremony celebrating his apotheosis.
Posted By: Discord

Re: Did the Ewoks eat the stormtroopers? - 08/30/08 10:55 AM

 Originally Posted By: PanzerMeyer
 Originally Posted By: Discord
I was wondering if the Ewoks ate the stormtroopers in Return of the Jedi.


An anthropological analysis of the Ewok tribal culture would indicate that this would be possible as implied by the scene where Luke and Han were tied to wooden sticks and were being prepared to be roasted at C3PO's ceremony celebrating his apotheosis.


See that's what had me thinking that they ate them since they had planned to do it to the Rebels. I wonder if they mentioned to the Rebel soldiers that were partying down on Endor that they were eating cloned meat?
Posted By: Colt40Five

Re: Did the Ewoks eat the stormtroopers? - 08/30/08 01:52 PM

I think Jedi should be remade in a very realistic and dark style with the ewoks portrayed as vicious cannibals.
Posted By: PanzerMeyer

Re: Did the Ewoks eat the stormtroopers? - 08/30/08 02:39 PM

 Originally Posted By: Colt40Five
I think Jedi should be remade in a very realistic and dark style with the ewoks portrayed as vicious cannibals.


And when Leia is first introduced to the Ewok tribe there should be a scene showing her being subjected to one of their traditional sex crazed, drug induced fertility ceremonies. \:D
Posted By: No Name

Re: Did the Ewoks eat the stormtroopers? - 08/30/08 03:09 PM

i think they ate george lucas' storytelling abilities
Posted By: jeroen

Re: Did the Ewoks eat the stormtroopers? - 09/01/08 02:24 AM

 Originally Posted By: PanzerMeyer
 Originally Posted By: Colt40Five
I think Jedi should be remade in a very realistic and dark style with the ewoks portrayed as vicious cannibals.


And when Leia is first introduced to the Ewok tribe there should be a scene showing her being subjected to one of their traditional sex crazed, drug induced fertility ceremonies. \:D
And then we're not even talking about the relation between Luke and Leia.
Posted By: Dart

Re: Did the Ewoks eat the stormtroopers? - 09/12/08 04:08 AM

1) As pointed out, they were ready to cook up Luke and Han without hesitation; not eating a Stormtrooper would be the weird thing.

2) No way they'd let all that protein go to waste. They're hunter/gatherers (did y'all see any planted fields? Me neither), and meat isn't something one passes on when one is a hunter/gatherer.

3) "Hey, Luke," says Han at the celebration feast, "for once the local meat doesn't taste like chicken. This is more like pork."
Posted By: IceManHG

Re: Did the Ewoks eat the stormtroopers? - 09/16/08 04:32 PM

At that point the Stormtroopers where not mostly clones. I dont think the Rebels would have allowed the Ewoks to eat all of them. Maybe just a few....:P
Posted By: PanzerMeyer

Re: Did the Ewoks eat the stormtroopers? - 09/16/08 04:37 PM

 Originally Posted By: IceManHG
At that point the Stormtroopers where not mostly clones.


That is correct. Almost all of the original clones from the Clone Wars were dead anyway either due to combat or advanced old age since the clones aged twice as fast as normal humans.
Posted By: Flanker35M

Re: Did the Ewoks eat the stormtroopers? - 09/23/08 11:18 AM

Strange to think Rebel Alliance, the good guys and light of the galaxy, would allow eating of human beings, even they were old enemies. It seemed Imperials left those critters pretty much alone in the movie. So makes think of ethics behind Rebel Alliance ;\) And the general portrait of Stormtroopers is pretty pathetic in Star Wars, but that is another issue ;\)
Posted By: Navigator

Re: Did the Ewoks eat the stormtroopers? - 09/24/08 10:36 PM

Stormtooper the other white meat. tastes like
Posted By: PanzerMeyer

Re: Did the Ewoks eat the stormtroopers? - 09/25/08 12:30 PM

 Originally Posted By: Navigator
Stormtooper the other white meat. tastes like


White meat? More like white plastic. \:D
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