Funny, but fake. A little research showed it originated from one of those military humor sites. Grabbing a wild adult raccoon and trying to hold on to it, to get it to breath into a breathalyzer? Can you spell Emergency Room visit. There you go, injecting real life 'facts', into a really 'cool propaganda' opportunity.  That is because the story is stupid. A sober person is unlikely to be able to even catch it, much less carry it back to the car. I won't even go into the possibility of getting it to breathe into the device sufficiently to activate it. Humor of this sort needs to be plausible before it can be funny. A stray dog, maybe, but not a wild animal that is well armed and pissed off.
ASUS ROG Maximus VIII Hero, i7-6700K, Noctua NH-D14 Cooler, Crucial 32GB DDR4 2133, Samsung 950 Pro NVMe 256GB, Samsung EVO 250GB & 500GB SSD, 2TB Caviar Black, Zotac GTX 1080 AMP! Extreme 8GB, Corsair HX1000i, Phillips BDM4065UC 40" 4k monitor, VX2258 TouchScreen, TIR 5 w/ProClip, TM Warthog, VKB Gladiator Pro, Saitek X56, et. al., MFG Crosswind Pedals #1199, VolairSim Pit, Rift CV1
| 
...
........ "It ain't so." 
