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#3496471 - 01/17/12 05:45 AM An American tourist in London
Simbo 123 SQDN Offline
Member

Registered: 10/04/03
Posts: 1148
Loc: Tonyrefail South Wales
An American tourist in London decides to skip his tour group and explore the city on his own. He wanders around, seeing the sights, and occasionally
stopping at a quaint pub to soak up the local culture, chat with the lads, and have a pint of Guinness.

After a while, he finds himself in a very high class neighbourhood.....big, stately residences... no pubs, no stores, no restaurants, and worst of all... NO PUBLIC TOILETS.

He really, really has to go, after all those Guinness's.

He finds a narrow side street, with high walls surrounding the adjacent buildings and decides to use the wall to solve his problem.

As he is unzipping, he is tapped on the shoulder by a London Bobby, who says, "I say, sir, you simply cannot do that here, you know."

"I'm very sorry, officer," replies the American, "but I really, really HAVE TO GO, and I just can't find a public toilet."

"Ah, yes," said the bobby..."Just follow me". He leads him to a back "delivery alley", then along a wall to a gate, which he opens.

"In there," points the bobby. "Whiz away sir, anywhere you want."

The fellow enters and finds himself in the most beautiful garden he has ever seen. Manicured grass lawns, statuary, fountains, sculpted hedges, and huge beds of gorgeous flowers, all in perfect bloom.

Since he has the cop's blessing, he unburdens himself and is greatly relieved.

As he goes back through the gate, he says to the bobby, "That was really decent of you... is that what you call 'English Hospitality'?"

"No, sir" replies the bobby, "that is what we call the Iranian Embassy."
_________________________
Mae hen wlad fy nhadau yn annwyl i mi,
Gwlad beirdd a chantorion, enwogion o fri;
Ei gwrol ryfelwyr, gwladgarwyr tra mâd,
Dros ryddid collasant eu gwaed.
Gwlad, gwlad, pleidiol wyf i'm gwlad.
Tra môr yn fur i'r bur hoff bau,
O bydded i'r hen iaith barhau.

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#3496492 - 01/17/12 06:21 AM Re: An American tourist in London [Re: Simbo 123 SQDN]
JimK Offline
Senior Member

Registered: 08/23/01
Posts: 4897
Loc: New Ulm, MN
biggrin
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#3496525 - 01/17/12 06:56 AM Re: An American tourist in London [Re: JimK]
Biggles07 Offline
Member

Registered: 01/22/09
Posts: 1811
Loc: Newcastle Upon Tyne, England.
Aye, Aye. Its all fun and games though, innit....Till ye get hit by 22. Double tap. Make f*cking sure. Regiment.




[video:youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R_9-3SEFcUM&feature=related[/video


]




Buh-bye.

Good riddance tae bad rubbish. No one will miss them. End of Discussion.

thumbsup


Edited by Biggles07 (01/17/12 07:40 AM)
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#3496528 - 01/17/12 07:04 AM Re: An American tourist in London [Re: Simbo 123 SQDN]
Maj_Alvega Online   tunes
Member

Registered: 12/27/10
Posts: 824
Loc: Portugal
rofl
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#3496541 - 01/17/12 07:34 AM Re: An American tourist in London [Re: Simbo 123 SQDN]
semmern Offline
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Registered: 03/19/01
Posts: 8808
Loc: Oslo, Norway
LOL! biggrin
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In all my years I've never seen the like. It has to be more than a hundred sea miles and he brings us up on his tail. That's seamanship, Mr. Pullings. My God, that's seamanship!

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#3496681 - 01/17/12 10:54 AM Re: An American tourist in London [Re: Simbo 123 SQDN]
Mark Aisthorpe Offline
Crazy Courier
Member

Registered: 02/03/02
Posts: 2439
Loc: London UK
LOL very funny
Incidentally there's a public toilet less than a 1/4 mile from the Iranian Embassy.
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#3496961 - 01/17/12 04:28 PM Re: An American tourist in London [Re: Simbo 123 SQDN]
semmern Offline
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Registered: 03/19/01
Posts: 8808
Loc: Oslo, Norway
The storming of the Iranian embassy was extremely well executed by the SAS. Watched all 10 parts of the documentary linked to above, and I was a bit appalled at the words of one of the hostages, Chris Cramer, saying that it was an uncivilised act to storm the embassy and kill the terrorists! And then he went on to say that at least he achieved the act of self preservation. By faking an illness and getting out several days before the others.

What a wanker! screwy
_________________________
In all my years I've never seen the like. It has to be more than a hundred sea miles and he brings us up on his tail. That's seamanship, Mr. Pullings. My God, that's seamanship!

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#3496985 - 01/17/12 05:15 PM Re: An American tourist in London [Re: semmern]
Biggles07 Offline
Member

Registered: 01/22/09
Posts: 1811
Loc: Newcastle Upon Tyne, England.
Originally Posted By: semmern
The storming of the Iranian embassy was extremely well executed by the SAS. Watched all 10 parts of the documentary linked to above, and I was a bit appalled at the words of one of the hostages, Chris Cramer, saying that it was an uncivilised act to storm the embassy and kill the terrorists! And then he went on to say that at least he achieved the act of self preservation. By faking an illness and getting out several days before the others.

What a wanker! screwy


Though it pains and troubles me to say so Semm....I agree. EPIC WANKER.

We call them 'Ingrates' and 'Target Practice' in England....And they are Legion.

hahaha
_________________________
"I am fond of pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals".

Sir Winston Churchill

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#3497017 - 01/17/12 06:30 PM Re: An American tourist in London [Re: Simbo 123 SQDN]
Dogsbd Offline
Senior Member

Registered: 10/28/04
Posts: 2598
Loc: SC, USA
The SAS ROCKS!!! thumbsup
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